Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Spring thoughts.

I'm sitting outside with the kids as I type today. They are playing and it is humid. It's supposed to thunderstorm later so we took it upon ourselves just to enjoy the little bit of time we have to be out here. We had a great Memorial Day weekend. Sunday we took the kids to the park here in town and let them play in the water. They had so much fun! Yesterday it was rainy and I fell asleep with Nora in my bed while enjoying the laziness of spring. I cant help but sit here and think about how big the kids have gotten and what the future may hold for us as a family. Will we have more children? Will I be able to follow through with my plans to home school the kids? Where will the Lord lead us and will we be quick to follow His calling?

Braden is soaking his body in rain water that his drizzled down the slide. He is rolling in it as if he is a playful poodle after a mid afternoon bath. And then he quickly makes his way to the sand box where he will now cover his entire body in particles that will end up in every single unknown crevice of his tiny little body.

Nora is decked out in her hand-me-down swimsuit and is currently trying to chase Braden with her bottle of bubbles. Her body is pale, long and swift. She is babbling some sort of nonsense words and thinks she is actually giving a pretty radical speech, pleading her case to stay outside even longer. She walks down the sidewalk just barely missing my flower garden, on purpose, of course. But wait, at this very moment she decided that "Flowers need a drink" and poured her entire bottle of bubbles over one (close to dead anyway) flower.

My spring days are, so far, filled with playing outside, lots of sunscreen, a baby boy who's personality is changing (causing me to feel ever so distant from him.), screaming at Heidi at least 100 times a day and telling her that she is the world's worst dog (but after watching Marley & Me, deciding that she's ok after all), waiting for people to randomly stop by to visit, listening to the sounds of birds, admiring my growing flowers, giving at least 2 baths per child a day (due to the water/sandbox combination), decorating the house, baking more than I should, absolutely no exercise and obnoxious beetle bugs adorning our door posts.

The Lord has blessed our life. I cant even begin to grasp the depth of His plan for us and yet the tip of it's entirety is already above what I could have imagined for my life. I find myself saying every day "Lord, let us live your will; help us to understand what it is you want us to do." And yet when I look around I truly feel that at this very moment, we are directly in the center of that will. It may change, but we will adapt. Wherever the Lord would have us to go, or do, we will. I am not afraid of where this journey will take us. I am only willing and ready to be obedient in those plans for us. This is a God who cares for us, knows us by name and spoke to my children in the womb. He is a loving, gracious, awesome God. How could I not want to surrender to His will?

My children are healthy. My marriage is thriving. My home is sturdy. We have more than we need, causing me to feel extremely selfish and unworthy at times. We are free and able to speak the name of Jesus. Because of these things alone, I surrender my life to Him. He has given me so much and I truly believe "To whom much is given, much is required."
Use Me Lord.

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