Saturday, November 14, 2009

My calling.

There are days when I feel extremely talented in certain areas. For instance, I think I'm a great cook. I have learned to bake well and take alot of pride in the foods I make for my family and friends to share. And then I read another blog of a woman who blogs only about cooking. And I begin to feel inferior. I doubt myself. I feel not good enough.

Same goes for photography, which is probably why I stopped taking alot of pictures for other people. I enjoyed doing it so much but suddenly, out of nowhere, I began to feel less than the next person who's pictures were more beautiful; more intriguing. Something crept in and I let the enemy get the best of me. I felt insufficient in my abilities and in my talent.

I love to decorate, I love to sing, I love to exercise.
But someone is always doing these things better. At a different level. More gracefully, passionately, and much more dedicated.

So one night as I was taking a relaxing bath it hit me.
These things that I enjoy and that I am good at are hobbies. They will always be a part of me. I will always cook, decorate, sing, exercise, and take pictures.
But these things are not my calling.

You see, I have known since I was a little girl what my true calling was. I recognized it at a young age and have utilized it ever since.
I am a writer.
If I could spend every minute of every day writing words on a page or putting them to a keyboard, my life would feel complete. I find incredible joy in putting words together to tell a story or validate a feeling. Nothing else that I do could ever compare to the feeling I get when I have completed a poem or a journal entry, or even a letter to my friends or family. There is just something about it that fulfills every part of who I am.

I know it's the calling that God gave to me because it has never been fleeting. It is etched inside of my heart and mind so tightly. I do not compare my writing with someone else's. In fact, I never have. It's not that I feel superior to anyone, but I feel adequate. I feel like my words are substantial, full of depth and steady. And I have never questioned this gift of mine.
I always knew I would use my words to glorify God.

If you are like me, you probably understand the need to find that one thing that is yours. The one thing that no one else can take from you. I truly believe that you will recognize your calling when it feels natural, it is incomparable to someone else, and it brings you more joy than you can even wrap your mind around. Search inside of yourself today and dig up that which is hidden inside!
It is so worth it.
So substantial.
So fulfilling.

If you know what your gift is, please share. I'd love to hear how God uses you!


Shea Posey said...

I still don't know if I've found my calling yet. Like you, there are so many hobbies I have but I'm not sooo passionate about them. I'm glad you know what you're calling is. I hope to find mine someday.

Reese said...

Hi Ramee. This post is beautiful. I, for one, love your gift. Your words speak to my soul.-Thank You! You ask me what my calling is? My calling is children. Sick, Well, Handicap, Abused, Depressed, children.


Yanick said...

My calling...good question. Can my calling be to be a mother? My very own mother still has a letter I wrote in 3rd grade about how i wanted to be a mother of four children. I laughed at it when i read it but the young real who wrote that was write. I wanted to be a mother. There is something so deep and beyond words that fills me when I found out I was to become a mother. That filling never went away but grows stronger with everyday my boys are alive and well. My calling hands down is to be a mother. I am lucky enough to know that and I actively try to make do with my calling and be the best mother I can be.

Beautiful post Ramee.

Tiffany said...

I am not sure if I have found mine yet, either. Mother, writer, photographer, wife, friend, crafter, chef lol. I LOVE them all! I love how you wrote this. You truly are gifted, and I am so glad to be able to read your words!