Monday, August 15, 2011

fitness for mabel.

It's no secret that fitness is important to Daniel and I.  We enjoy working out in any way, shape or form.  Recently, Daniel has started mass gaining.  Some of you noticed this at the race (which made him feel really good about himself I'll have you know).
  He's working hard, eating alot and lifting more. 

For me, fitness is all about my sanity.  It's about running for 30 minutes while pushing two over sized children so that I can listen to music and release some really happy endorphins.  It's about riding my bike 10 miles and sweating out every bad feeling experienced earlier in the day.  It's about that quiet time with God where He and I can speak and listen to one another without a million other voices.
 The race was really special to me in so many ways, one of which was that it was still very fitness focused.  Some of us are building muscle, some of us are running to lose weight, some of us just want to maintain a healthy lifestyle.  But I thought it was important to let people see that while we can all be active for many different reasons, Mabel may not have that same chance.  It's never something we should take for granted.  It doesn't matter if you can only walk from your front door to your car...I believe you should do that a couple of times each day. 

Fitness is not about a size.  It's not about a weight.  It's about doing what you {individually} can do.  It's about raising your heart rate and feeling the effects of that physically and then experiencing them emotionally and mentally. 

The race made me really happy.  We had people from all different places in life joining us.  Some were pregnant [and glowing beautifully] like Jess.  Some had just had babies a few weeks before like my cousin Susan.  Some were older, some were very young.  Some were out of shape and some were cross country pros.  All were there for a greater purpose and pushed through because of Mabel.   

One of my greatest dreams for my perfect little life with healthy children was that when they all became teenagers we could go running, biking, hiking, swimming, and rock climbing all together.  It may seem silly but throughout this year with Mabel, I have grieved that dream a little bit.  I know we will still do those things but I have come to accept that they may look alot different in this real life than they did in my dream for us.
But then again, so do alot of things.  I would never have thought that Rachel and Harper would be here with me and they are.  That is better than any dream I could have had!  I looked back on my bike ride a couple of days ago and felt such a beautiful joy when looking at Harper. 
This reality is far better than my simple dreams...

I still want to focus my family around fitness.  I want the children to be active and enjoy sweating.  I want them to see how important it is to take care of ourselves and to be strong.  Now I have a greater motivation, because of Mabel, to encourage them to use their muscles and their energy in positive ways and to never waste this awesome gift that God has given them. 

It makes me sad sometimes, wondering if Mabel will walk or do the simple things that I find such pleasure in.  But I am determined to continue finding joy in these things because they are pulling me through each day. 

So if you see me out walking the redheads [who are far too big for the double stroller] please just know that I am doing it because Mabel cannot...and because I need to remain healthy in my mind for this little girl.  I need to have clarity each day and this is what brings it. 
If you see me riding my bike with a couple kids in the cart, just wave and know that I am ok.  I am not crazy.  In fact, I am far from it. 
I am strong and determined to let my body's natural reaction to exercise be my antidepressant through this challenging and often exhausting time. 
I encourage each of you to get out and be active as well.  Fitness is a lifestyle, as cliche' as that may sound.  It's something that becomes part of your day to day because it makes you feel good.  It is what we were designed to do. 
Wanna join me?  Email me!  I'd love to walk, jog, or bike with you anytime!!!

"This is what the Sovereign Lord says to these bones: I will make breath enter you, and you will come to life. "

Ezekiel 37:4-6

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