Friday, January 13, 2012

snow day.

It feels months over due but I'll take it nonetheless.  

After a week of evaluations, medicine adjustments, increased seizures, decreased pooping, insurance calls, possible curvature of the spine, definite delayed gastric emptying, phone calls and welcoming my friend sadness back into the house--I was beyond ready for something refreshing and exciting.

Snow is my absolute favorite thing in the entire world.  It's no secret.  
I woke up feeling child-like in my excitement yesterday and by 8:30 am, already had the kids up and dressed to join the adventure.  Cold as it was, we only stayed out for about 25 minutes but they loved every second of it.  Nora lasted much longer than Braden, who came in crying and wanting hot chocolate.  
We made it, enjoyed it, and said 'cheers' to our first snow day of the winter.

  Technically this was Mabel's first snow.  Last year she was still sleeping all day every day and she was far too little to be out in it, so I was determined to at least sit her in it this year.
  She didn't seem to mind [of course.]  
Happy First Snow, baby!
 I packed up sadness into the pockets of my pink snow pants and decided to let him off at the bottom of the sledding hill.  He'll return again soon, I'm sure, but it is always nice to send him on his way.  At one point I wasn't able to let loose of his company.  In some sick way, he was all I had to hold on to.  But lately, I have discovered that a little bit of distance has been good for the both of us.  Sadness is always welcome here.  He feels familiar and has seen me through many of my most terrifying days.  But he doesn't need to stay anymore.  He can visit and go.  So today we parted ways and I said, "Farewell for today, sadness....I'll be here when you return again..."  I felt him let loose and leave as I swallowed in the coldest air I have ever breathed.
 As I walked up the hill with my big little girl, I watched her face and memorized it. 
She loved this day.  She loved this snow day and sledding with her mama.  This is what it's all about.  Letting sadness go so that I can enjoy these moments with my children--and really enjoy them.  
There is nothing like the softness of a snow day.  The beauty of the white is so light and refreshing.  
Yesterday was the day that I said goodbye to sadness and welcomed consciously happy moments for the week.  Despite the other stuff going on around me [as always], I enjoyed yesterday's white for the beautiful things that it offered.  25 minutes of clear, quiet, happy.

My snow day.

1 comment:

Tiffany said...

We are knitted much the same way, Rame. Today is our snow day - not enough to sled yet. Hopefully soon. Glad that you enjoyed the day. Praying for many more of those happy moments to shower over you. Love you.