lights.

 My sweet loves,

You will never know how much I love you.  

From the second I woke up today I just couldn't get close enough.  I wanted to be wrapped in each of you, warm and safe.  I wanted you to feel the same.  

I paid close attention to your beautiful details.  Each and every one of them is so unique to who you are.  Your eyelashes, thick and dark or long and red.  Your lips and the way they rest; open or closed.  Your exuberance and energy or your quiet and timid ways.  There are things about each of you that tell me the very intimate details of who you are now and who you will grow to be.  You are all so special to me.

There are moments when I wish I could shelter you from this world and all the suffering that comes because we live in it.  But then I realize that sheltering you would hinder you.  This world challenges us.  I hope that by learning about hard things and giving you a safe place to ask difficult questions, you will gain ethics and morals that define your soul.  In your future I pray that you can look back and see that rather shielding you from it, I helped you embrace the pain because even in our pain, there is deep, saturated joy.

 Joy comes from the Maker, kids.  

He is the Maker of all things.  He is the detail in the detail.  He is the all knowing and most importantly, the all caring.  He has entrusted you to your dad and I and we don't take that lightly.  In fact, every day we are desperate to give you everything that you need so that you can fulfill His plan for your life.  

We are aware that His plan may look different than our dreams for you.  We are ok with that.  We just want to guide and direct you towards the path where there is growth.  The path that will etch and form your hearts.  We want you to be Christ-seekers in all things and our hope is that, even now, you see us doing the same.  Because in pain or joy, struggle or triumph, life or death...if we simply seek Christ above all other things, He will absolutely stand with us and live in us as He promised.  

If you live a life hard after our God I can promise you one thing for sure in this life:

Even when you feel lonely, you will never be alone. 

Not ever. 

 Today I feel such abundance in this big cozy home that we share with you three.  

I am crazy in love with who you are and what you bring to this family.  

Thank you for making your dad and I better people and for pushing us to never live in the mundane.  

You are the light of our lives.