Saturday, September 20, 2014

Little Life Updates.

As she always does, Autumn has sure delivered. 
The morning light shines perfectly onto the front porch and the faces of my children, so much so that an edit or a filter are not required.  It's marvelous.  
This year we tried really hard to see and experience every "super moon."  There were several with this last one being the largest.  Supposedly we will not witness another moon it's size for another 30 years.  We drove to a country road, waited {impatiently and annoyingly} in the van and then headed for home when, at the time the moon was supposed to appear, it did not.  Low and behold as we were driving away we happened to catch a glimpse of it's massive size in the rearview mirror.  We found another spot on another road and quite literally danced in it's presence. 
There is nothing like celebrating the beauty that our God provides. 
We have pulled out scarves, and dark colored lipstick.  The boots came out of boxes and colored leggings and tights have been pulled over our bare legs. 
The time has come.  

This past week our town experienced a huge loss when a teenage boy my brother's age committed suicide.  It was a devastating and heavy week for this small town.  Just like every tragedy it made me dig deep and think about the time not spent with my siblings and all the people I love really.  It's a frustrating reality that we have to actually live our lives; busying around and missing out on the things that are most important-our relationships.  But the truth that I was reminded of yet again this week is that it wouldn't ever matter how much time was spent with them if something happened to them and they were suddenly gone.  It would never have been enough.  I love them more than my own life; more than my own breath.  They feel like an appendage of mine; two arms connected to me strongly, deeply.  Without them I am not quite sure how I would find the strength to go on.
So I have spent the week praying, crying and quite literally pleading with God to give this family strength and comfort.  There's just nothing earthly that can heal that kind of pain.  
Nora and I have had a great school year so far.  Last year was rough and so I was expecting every morning to be an argument or a stressful situation with her but truly, she has done great.  We did have one bad day where she cried hard and had to go to school late.  She is a little anxious, girls have started whispering, she worries about Mabel, and she missed me.  Enough tears and all of that was a good enough reason for me to not force her in the car until she was ready.  She went on to have a good day and a really great week.  She is incredibly smart and her school work is punctual and particular.  She is going to great things!
While the big kids are in school, Mabel and I stick to our same daily routine. 
She wakes, I feed her.  She gets changed and I make the beds.  She fusses and I walk her.  She bites my shoulder and I laugh and swing her.  We get dressed and blanketed and head out for a morning walk.  We listen to music and she giggles and sometimes seizes. 
We spend our days together and it's a beautiful gift for the both of us.  She adores me the way I feel about her and there is nothing in this world better than that. 
Overall she has been doing ok, though this week was pretty rough.  She had an increase in seizures, some that were pretty big and lasted pretty long.  She ended up running a fever and developed a few blisters on her feet.  The fever has since went down though it has still been low grade on and off.  I'm hoping it's something viral that will just 'run it's course,' and hoping that this winter goes easy on my girl.
I'm still in love and have never been happier. 
I have learned that just like my relationship with God cannot be put into a box, neither can my idea of love or family.  Our little family functions more like a family, feels more like a family and loves more like a family than I remember it ever being before.  It is easy, without stress and is so functional.  My love is natural, practical, romantic, present, and incredibly light.  I have never been more grateful that I was willing to open my heart again and experience what life would bring. 
My heart and my life are so full!

This week the kids had spirit week at school.  Nora loved getting involved and rocked it on 80's day.  She knew it too, saying, "I bet no one will look this good today!"
She was right.  They didn't.  

Apple pie, wooly worms on a country road, new candles, and apple butter.
Fall sweet fall.  
And, to kick it off officially, we enjoyed the Homecoming parade with friends and celebrated our small town with a victory football game last night.  We are so lucky to live where we live, love how we love and find joy in it all.  I have never felt more grateful for the chance to experience life with these kids, my friends and the man I adore.  It's my dream come true.  
Enjoying fall and all of it's wonders has never been more exciting. 
Happy Weekend, Friends.  

1 comment:

Andy and Jenni said...

So glad things are going so well for you! Here's to more crunch and rustle, to more little girl giggles and big kid squeals, to more tights and scarves and pumpkin everything. To more hand holding and heart growing, to more of all the good things - this fall and always. xo